I think that Robin Tomach Lakoff has a point in saying that groups or individuals that do not have a history of hearing hate speech “just don’t get it.” I have been having a hard time connecting with some of the essays in this chapter of our readings. I have also been having a hard time processing my own thoughts regarding hate speech and I shall attempt to explain why.
I have personally not been a victim of hate speech so I do not know by experience the damage done by hate speech and I confess, I do not fully “get it.” I understand that words can be hurtful and I have been hurt by words before. The people that are closest to me have the greatest capacity to hurt me though; it is because I have made myself vulnerable to them in opening up to them. When I hurt or am hurt by a friend, the problem is resolved by us talking through it, not by the offender being punished. I would not wish restrictions on what my friends say to me, human relationships often involve us hurting each other unfortunately, and that is often due to misunderstanding between one another. The beauty of hurtful words between friends is the ability to work through those situations and the result is often (but not always) a closer friendship.
I care about what the people close to me think. If and when a stranger insults me I do not care what they say or think about me, their words are like droplets of water that roll off an oily surface. The words of a stranger do not penetrate, therefore they do not have the chance to wound me. When hearing and reading about “hate speech,” I think of it as a similar situation, as a stranger saying offensive and hurtful words to another stranger. When thinking about hate speech this way, I “just don’t get it” because I do not understand how the words of a stranger can deeply and even mentally wound a person. I think, “just don’t let it bother you;” but it obviously is something more than this and can damage a person or a group of people. In the Greek language there is a word “ginosko” that can be translated “know by experience.” There is a difference between knowing something in your head and knowing something by experience. I do not understand hate speech and the apparent harm it causes because I have not experienced it for myself, I do not “ginosko“ it. This is not to say that I do not wish to understand though. If any of you have been the victim of hate speech I would appreciate hearing how it has affected you. It is hard for me to sympathize with someone or a group if I do not hear another’s personal experience. I think Lakoff summarizes my thoughts on this issue well in saying, “So if our group, or you as an individual member of that group, have never been subjected to epithets in the past, no words directed at you, however irritating, can have the full noxious effect of true hate speech” (437).
-E
I, too, have never been the victim of hate speech. I grew up in suburbia for the most part. I do remember not understanding my playmates when they would make racial slurs. I am sure they were never the victims either and were merely repeating the words they heard their parents say as they were watching the news, etc. That is the essence of what Lakoff said when she wrote about historical repetition and legacy of such language.
ReplyDeleteI would like to say "I get it now," but I am not so sure that I do. It's not like I want to really experience it, either. It's bad enough when someone looks at me in a reproachful way. I can't imagine compounding that feeling with hateful words.
I too have not been a victim of hate speech, and I agree with your point that words can hurt someone. When you state, “If and when a stranger insults me I do not care what they say or think about me, their words are like droplets of water that roll off an oily surface”, you are basically implementing that good old saying “you’re rubber I’m glue, whatever you say will stick on you”. It is wonderful that you can so easily brush off anything hurtful that someone you don’t care about says about you, but I’m not the same way. Words can hurt me, even if it is someone I don’t know. Often times at work, I will get customers that are having a bad day, and they will take out their frustrations on me. That hurts when it is over, and over, and over. I can easily see how someone can be hurt by someone using hate speech. They don’t need to know them. When someone has heard something hurtful so many times, by so many people it can really take a toll. I wish that I could brush off some of the hurtful words that customers say like my coworkers do, but I have been dealing with customers since I was 16, and it is hard to simply brush off hurtful language, when they are clearly and utterly wrong.
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